So I sat there, listening to the song I listened to every single day of the second semester of my senior year in high school. And then I thought of him, and then I thought of you and how much I love you. My heart feels so strange. I don't even know whats stopping me from reaching out, but then again, last night made things become so unbalanced. I'm afraid to tip the scale, and then both of us will be tumbling into the black abyss. My heart has mixed feelings about how you feel, about how you felt. And quite frankly, sometimes its hurts more than you could ever imagine. As if literally tearing my heart apart would be less painful than this, this deep ebbing flow of sorrow that pulsates with my heart beat.
When I told you I loved you, and you said it was too early, I couldn't breathe. Because you thought I had just said that, but I really do. And I think upon the fact that I passed your house the same time last year, and maybe you were inside, and I didn't know my future and my present
was sitting right behind those doors. You are my everything, no matter how hard I wish you weren't.
I've never felt so alone. You were the one person I had left back at home, but now you've moved on.
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